Why?

So here I am pushing 50 and decided to share my life with whoever is out there.

Me? Cuban, American citizen, grew in Puerto Rico, have lived in Spain and England, Spanish teacher at a better to do high school in the ATX.

So why now? Well, I am seeing mortality in the face. As far back as I can remember, there were nights when the thought of me dying would make me jump out of bed and run around the house to keep it out of my mind. Yes, I do mean when I was little. I used to cry when my mom sang me to sleep because I knew some day she would die. Seriously, I did. 

Something about the whole Catholic heaven and hell maybe? Maybe. I am a Catholic. Probably will die one too.

Now, I am sincerely looking at it and seeing there is a bit more behind than ahead. Funny how that works. Yeah, those night thoughts do come by to visit and they do shake me up a bit. But I don't get up and walk around the house. I enjoy the bed too much now and just lay there, praying, thinking something else, listening to the new agey music that helps me sleep. Oh sure. with the advances medicine is doing now, you could live to 100. So I'm semi-officially middle aged now. Oopteedoo.

What makes all this even more delightfully weird is that, since I teach these teenagers, many of them (after they graduate) become my friends, hang out with me, and it all warps the way you see life. I do like them, by the way. I became a teacher because I like teenagers. Now that makes me weird, I know. But I do enjoy them. So much in fact that I am involved with the youth program at my church. Taught cathequism last year, doubt I'll do it this year. Way too much of a hassle. But I will be involved with retreats and youth group Sundays too.

At my age any new pain, I get to imagining it is something bad. My back hurts, could it be bad? Could it really be something else? Yeah, paranoia can easily set it.

Getting a semi foggy picture of me? Hope so. I'll be adding more as time goes on.

enjoy.