Back in the ATX

Made it back to Austin.

My poor little Lucy - she's gone through a lot of traveling. I should explain that Lucy is my car. Its a pretty old red car - Mazda Protege. Since she's a red head and I'm Cuban, I could only name her Lucy.

I have had so many emotions with all this with mom and dad. I was talking to a friend tonight about it. It just seems like they will be there forever since they have been there all of your life. It does not seem like they will ever go away. Its so strange realizing that they will go away. As a Christian I do believe I will get to be with them again. Its just that I am going to miss them terribly when they do go.

And it really seems like they will go soon. I mean, how do you fight something that is bound and determined to take your parents away. Let's see - mom has TWO major cancers going, dad has one and possibly Alzheimer's. They both have elevated blood sugar. They both don't exactly eat well. The list is there and it seems that all is going against them.

One of my mom's friends almost made me cry one day. See, I worry about them and that they have some way to be taken care of. My sister is good at it, but she has her health and things to deal with also. Like I was saying, we were just standing around talking about nothing major. This woman looked at me and she said, "Don't worry about your parents. We take care of them like they were our own parents." I had a lump in my throat. I tried hard not to cry. I think she noticed cause she gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

I watched the movie Bella tonight at church (Youth Group - I'm one of the adults involved in the group). Watching this family on screen I came to the realization that I may not have that whole family reunion, dinner together, fun and heart warming times for much longer. Oh, I do have my sister and her family but it just doesn't feel the same. She is Americanized and my Latino heart just doesn't feel the feeding that I do at home with my parents, or on one of their dinners.

There are so many emotions going through me right now.

Sadness. Heartfelt gratefulness. Fear. Joy.

I think of them every day and every night. I wonder how they will get along there without me doing stuff for them or watching out for them.

They've been doing it without me for a while - I think they may be able to continue without me.

I better stop now. I think I may have a good cry and get on with life. Teachers start tomorrow and I will be talking about all this with them. All good friends that worry about me.

Bueno Bye.

Old folks like old cars

and when I saw this Pontiac Firebird, my heart went all a flutter.

"What a piece of junk!"
Luke Skywalker

"She'll make point five past lightspeed. She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid. I've made a lot of special modifications myself."
Han Solo

Lettuce or a dollar bill? You decide.

Macy's sense of humor

Gotta love it.

Coming attractions

Tomorrow is María's birthday. We get to eat Italian food since that is what she wants. She's been on an interesting kick - she has been getting acupuncture for the pain and now is into a "healthier" life style with a few new teas and a diet consisting of mostly fish, even though Michael does not like fish. Wonder how Italian food fits into this.

Went shopping today at Macy's - one of the last few that has survived in OK city. Got some clothes by this brand I never heard of before - Cubavera. Great shirts.

Thursday is mom's appointment to get a full body scan. She is not looking forward to it. She hates that scanner. Told her that if she wanted I'd set up one of the iPods with music to relax. She nixed it.

Hoping to leave here by Thursday so I can have the weekend to get back into the ATX way and back to school on Monday. Mom wants me stay Thursday night and leave Friday. This is the same woman who is concerned about me driving without AC.

OK, After this I'll add some pix. Enjoy.

Bueno Bye.

Pandora ain't got shite on me

Fixing your car AC the first time - $60

Going back and doing it again - $80

Realizing that you did this to make your mom happy and that you may have just realized there is more to this than you thought - priceless.

Pardon me while I whip this out.

This one is some random thoughts that I haven't shared - Caffeine is not needed. I honestly can't believe I wrote that but its true. I have had no caffeine in a while. My Mormon friends would be happy. A few think that will be the jumping point to becoming a Mormon. Yah, like the whole idea of a planet after you die doesn't sound confusing enough.

Lucy is back in the shop cause there is a leak in the AC. Should not be too bad or too expensive.

Learned to make mojitos. Get ready. Will be making some for parties.

Weird little dreams all over the place. A few have to do with a friend that recently contacted me after months of being "out of service." Others, I know have to do with the paranoid feeling I get while noticing my parents age and my own approach at mortality.

I Love Lucy is funny is Spanish - specially when they make Ricky sound Cuban. Yes, we Cubans have a "special" little accent when we speak Spanish.

I am determined that I must get my Master's and that I HAVE to go back to Spain. I miss it way too much.

Bueno bye.

PS - the picture . . . I took it at my doctor's clinic. One of them has a great sense of humor.